Everything hurts blissfully

I can´t believe it.. it´s 01:03 in the morning and everything is done... everything. Ok, except those:

Today I finished 5 (in words: FIVE) canvases and corrected one additional. I haven´t done that many since.. well, last year in April when I had my last huge deadline. >_>

My back hurts, my neck hurts, my arm hurts and even my butt hurts from sitting too long on a chair made for sitting straight (but not comfortable). But nevertheless I´m in a bliss. It´s done.. nothing to worry about. Just some small canvases left.. who cares. Those are easy. No backgrounds, no trees (ok, one tree...), no million clouds and no more red hoods (just carrots... but those don´t count).

I hope I won´t regret the night-shift when I wake up in five hours. Uh... @_@ ...



don´t panic... 5 illustrations in two days... and book-signing... and two illustration corrections. I can do this.. I can... ok, I HAVE to, but it´s still possible that I actually *can* do it.

This gonna be a looonngg night. And next night: as well. I think I´m gonna be sleepy all day in office but well, just a huge illustration and a huge meeting to do. Well... I still have the option of drugging me with ten double shot coffees >_>;

omg, omg, omg

ps... my workspace at daytime. Looks a lot better with daylight. Not that I see it liek that too often ^^;


summer evening

just a very small part of the whole scenery... oh man, I have a new addiction to warm colors...



weeeee!!! My Doki & Nabi Fanart is located in the fanart section of the Sambakza homepage. I´m so happy (double because Amalloc really liked the fanart and OF COURSE I´m proud if the original creator likes my "interpretation"). I´m so pathetic.


Contest & Books

a little happy b-day contest like every year. this time only on deviantart.
The entry about it can be found here:

Good luck!

*omigosh... bouncing around*
I just found three new books I totally wanna read (and of course those will take AGES to arrive... hello three very long weeks).

This is... so far my top one of the three:

"After her boyfriend dumps her for her older sister, sophomore Savannah Delano wishes she could find a true prince to take her to the prom. Enter Chrissy (Chrysanthemum) Everstar: Savannah’s gum-chewing, cell phone–carrying, high heel-wearing Fair Godmother. Showing why she’s only Fair—because she’s not a very good fairy student—Chrissy mistakenly sends Savannah back in time to the Middle Ages, first as Cinderella, then as Snow White. Finally she sends Tristan, a boy in Savannah’s class, back instead to turn him into her prom-worthy prince."

If you know "Grimms Manga" and enjoyed the twisted stories this might be enjoyable as well... There have been a lot of "modern interpretations" of the old fairy tales (some good, most bad but all too weird to be forgotten (by me)), I hope this one is better than the last I read. I just hope so... I really do.


welcome to the club

I´ve managed to read mostly every book I have (which is surprising, I didn´t read that many within the last months also I bought some here and there). Weee! Now, if that´s not cool. The only problem is: Nothing left. I read some of the "old books again and mostly those are the books I really stick to.
But while working a lot I like to have "light lecture". You know Rosamunde Pilcher? Of course it´s mushy and predictable but that is the only reason why women buy it. A friend´s grandma once said: "I love those Pilcher movies, it doesn´t matter if you miss the last 40 minutes asleep, you know the end anyway."

I won´t read Rosamunde now (I read one and I felt too young for it o_o) but I read Nora Roberts. Nata and I guessed that she´s having a pimped 8ball for her plots or some pimped "which relation do they have this time"-dices. The difference between some books are *eventually* the location and the number of "goodlooking, adorable single brothers" and if you have an "evil person who shows up to make problems" or twoo shy people quarreling 120 pages before jumping into bed.

Of course every books ends with a "Will you marry me?" (and I still wonder if I missed some years inbetween the pages... thats real speed-dating). Did I spoil you? Oh what a shame... XD

Anyway, the funny thing about the books is that you have some stereotypes which can be found in nearly every book.
the main actor: goodlooking, has a little problem with himself but is allover very happy with his life
the main actress: very feminin, very independent, had some bad experiences with men in the past but got over it and decided that she won´t fall for another good looking... well, you get the rest
brothers: most of the times two, goodlooking as well (one outgoing, one shy, careful and secretly in love with a neighbour for AGES)
the old lady: likes to gossip, but very motherly. can be a neighbour or somebody from the staff

there are some less important parts which show up now and than but after 20 books i believe the biggest fun is finding all stereotypes and guessing who will marry who when in which upcoming book. I am kinda impressed. Nora Roberts squeezes so many "different" (ok, not really but different enough to be seen as books) plots out of those simple combinations. I wonder why I never thought about writing novels for middle-aged women. O_o

The main question: Why do I read it? Simply because I won´t be able to get into an Irving novel after 12 hours work. Or... Wilde. You have to read those books on a Saturday without any other plans. For the rest of the week I stick to my beloved junkfood and complain about a lack of plot. But oh my, I enjoy them too much to stop. It´s a bit like a literal car accident: You can´t stop reading even if you think it´s disgusting. XD


for me it´s already october...

unfinished illustration for my work... I like the colors :3 I just wish there was a button in PS for "all work done". XD


Office Buddy

he lost his whiskers two years ago :(...
photo kindly donated by office-paparazzo Heiko


tiny details...

unfinished stuff for work. Just a small detail of a cute skirt on a chubby teddy. I love those tiny details like stitches or patterns.


the disappearance of tissues

my normal computer crashed two weeks ago and now it´s *finally for the first* time at a maintance and repair service. And of course those guys won´t call back or tell me a final "you will get your baby back"-day. This sucks so much...
I still have my netbook *thanks god* and it´s okay to work in but I guess trying to work with photoshop on a netbook won´t be such a good idea. :(
But it´s cute, ne?

Anyway, I called in sick today and I really wish I can be back in the office tomorrow. After being @ home for 11 days I feel like I have cabin fever. I want to work, I want my normal working-mode back. Think I´m not made for staying home :/

In the mean-time and while humming nervoursly over 5 illustrations I realized that my last portfolio update was in 2005. :( And since I got an agency-request (weeee!!!) I guess I have to do a new one. Which is annoying. In four years I made so many things I don´t really know where to start.
Put everything in? -> The "I impress you by mere mass" way
Selection? -> The "I have sooo many more but I won´t show" way

I even start failing at the cover and headline. o_o
Showcase? Portfolio (now, this is lame... of COURSE it´s a portfolio), Works of.. (lame as well), ... I think I have to call Sarah and tell her that she won´t get the new portfolio before Christmas. >_<

So... when you have a flue the tissues disappear just like socks in the washing-machine. I can´t have used a whole package o_o ... have I?


The Stretcher Frame

So... some people asked me if they really have to use the wedges attached to a canvas. The answer is simple: Yes, you have to, if you don´t want to have a tottering canvas when you work on it.

Two examples... left is linen (my favourite) with very strong and small wedges. Rhe right one is cotton canvas (which I use because I´ll run soon out of linen and can´t buy new before tomorrow..). The cotton wegdes are cheaper than the linen ones and tend to twist and break. One reason why I hate to use them. :(

So, how u use it (example on linen canvas)

1. Step Put the wedge with the angled side slightly into the pre-cut space left for the wedge. There are two spaces for two wedges, you have to start *of course* with the lower one.

2. Step take the hammer and try to hit it evenly. If you have "scratches" on the front showing up after hammering don´t worry. Those will vanish when you start to work on it. Just... try to hit the wedge straight - or else it might break or you might hit yourself.

3. Step put in the upper wedge (again the angles side "sliding" on the frame).. take the hammer and drive it into the frame.

4. Step admire the wedges :) you can see that the frame slightly departed. Don´t worry, this is absolutely ok. You frame won´t fall apart. This happens while strecthing and will stay like that. The wedges will keep everything in place.

When if the canvas perfectly strechted? If you are done with all wedges and tap lightly on the canvas with your fingers it should sound like a drum. I love the vibrating sound, it shows you that the canvas is ready.

If you want to buy canvas with plastic wedges attached: Don´t buy those. The worst quality available. I bought those once at the very beginning. You can´t really use the wedges and the canvas will start sagging sooner or later >_>

So, back to work, I have five canvases waiting to get primed. Dang @_@ The flue got me, I guess it´s normal in spring to run around sniffing and coughing.


This is just so wrong...

When you have a fullt-ime job painting is a bit complicated. Mostly because I´m really tired when I come home from work but also because you have to puzzle around with things like "doing the dishes", "crap, I need to wash my cloths", "oh my... we wanted to go to the cinema", "birthday?! Which birthday?!!!" and just the normal stuff most people manage in their freetime. The only problem is: What do you do when the "freetime" is down to 4 hours. Which you might better invest in getting your illustrations done.

So I took some days off. Which might be cool. But now I have a constant headache due to bending just centimeters over the canvas. When I bought my drawing I thought: "Oh so cool, you can change the angle. Never again pain in my neck! Weee!!!"

The only problem: it doesn´t work if you have like 30 tubes, a water-glass and dozens of brushes lying around. Try that in a 45° angle (without gluing everything to the table). So i have like 4 unfinished canvases, a heavy "burn forest burn"-color problem and headache.

I thought a lot about the copyright problem too...
On the one hand: Obviously I can´t make the watermarks bigger and uglier because normal people won´t accept and understand it and honestly I don´t do pretty illustrations just to destroy the whole image thoroughly with a watermark.
On the other hand: There will always be people stealing. Ever. If you don´t do things non-compatible with a so called "mainstream" taste, people will steal. Sure...

Dang, why do my neighbours have to start making out next to my window just now... and crap, that woman stresses me out. If they are not trying to procreate, they are fighting.. arrggg!

Back to topic *using earplugs...* so if .... rah, I don´t want porno dolby while working on children´s book illustrations! I can´t concentrate.... the two might be happy but you don´t have to entertain the whole STREET. >_>;

So, anyway, I hate legal stuff, it is annoying that I have to spend hours on the phone, hours at the lawyer just to make sure somebody who spend five minutes with stealing will stop.
And it doesn´t make the whole situation any better when I get mail like that:
"Hi, I would like to have XY as a poster. Can I order it? Or.. if you don´t have time, could you send me the high resolution file so that I can print it on my own?"... what? O_O ... sure I send you my highresolution files. You want the pin for my bank account as well?

*looking deep into my bunny mug and wish that all those things will vanish and evaporate*

Copyright? Like I care...

somebody from deviantart was so nice to link me an ebay-store which sells tattoos for nails. Yes.. nails. And if this isn´t bad enough: The owner steals art. I would gladly drive to her hometown *which is in Germany* and slap her for that. Wtf? I know you can´t earn that much money with a nail studio but isn´t it enough so that you have to STEAL?

The item was sold 4 times before I even knew about it and all I can hope is that the little creeper looses her selling-rights on ebay.

Why do I make it public? Because she doesn´t deserve anything else and even this isn´t enough. And because she´s much more interested in making illegally money than contacting people and ask about a license.

I know I am not behaving any better with this post but if you ever were in the same situation you might understand.


Happy Coffee

Last Friday @ Wasabi
Lao borrowed me a slice of carrot (she got it back) for my happy face coffee. Hehe...

For those who ever happen to be in Berlin:

Friedrichstraße 114

10117 Berlin
how to get there:
U6, M1, M6, Tram 12, S Oranienburger Str, S Friedrichstraße


I wanna be a manga!

this is ridiculous...
Babara Salesch is a Tv-show with a fake court and fake prosecutors.. fake cases and very bad actors. It´s just a pseudo-documentary show and believe it or not: It seems to work.
The script-writers don´t even care about proper research and well... Sat 1, the TV station, hosts the "Who is Who" section for Barabara Salesch under "comedy show" online. I think that might say all. >_>

anyway, Lew linked me the most awesome case about a cosplay girl who was (or might have been or never was... ) harrassed by a photographer. Ok, I admit, that *might* happen now and than and it´s a bad side-effect but why on earth did THIS happen:

Part one- I wanna be a Manga
"I always dreamed about being a manga..."
Oh well, not anybody wants to be a book... I think I have never seen a cosplayer cosplaying a manga. A sack rice... yes, but never a manga. Maybe that´s cosplaying 1.5

Part two-moshi moshi
"How would that be called in manga?"
Yes, we totally ignored the fact that "manga" is a language. And moshi moshi means nothing else than "hello"... even if you don´t telephone.

Part three- the colorful ink
"The colourful ink just flowed out of my heart."
and the best: "She just wants to chop up the cosmic band between us."
Yeah... we all have a cosmic band. Normally it´s black and attached to a black collar on one cosplayers neck and the leash in the hand of her/his best buddy.

oh my. welcome to the freak show.... I´m really sorry for all cosplayers. After reading an article that most cosplayers come out of shattered families the TV show finally makes total sense. Let´s take the cosmic band and strangle all bad scrip-writeres with it.


db evolution

i watched the movie today (pre pre pre screening... don´t ask) and it was just sooo BADDDDD. I can´t even put it into a coherent sentence. I just want my 87 minutes back.
If you know the comics (and the tv series) you´ll run our screaming or sit in your seat frozen and shocked. The whole thing wasn´t even funny. ;_;
The actors are bad, the non-existing story is bad, no logic just a lot of special effects which can´t even create a "wow" because even those are bad. Rahhh! why did they do it?
I even wished fo the bloody panty to emerge because that might have saved the whole movie but no panty at all. (you know which panty I mean, but since no Oolong in sight ... no panty)



painting is a crux.. if you´re german

I think I never gonna finish it... haha =_= the sketch has been hanging in my kitchen since September last year and still I think "I should do it" ... than some days later: "Na, wanna paint cute." Some days later: "Paint it!".... and so on.

I think i can say it openly and nobody´s gonna blame me for my very own personal point of view: some communities just suck.... and the problem is: Most are german. =_= I cannot understand why especially the german art-scene is excessively trying to force pros to produce better and better and better art even if you just wanna paint and relax.
It´s odd and especially the reasons aren´t any reasons at all. The main question is: Who do you paint for?
I don´t mean commercial art or art you have to do for a project but your very own fun-art. Those pieces you do if you wanna just paint. Would you like to get a comment like "Well, nice but you can do better."
Isn´t it unfair to say such a thing?

Some people say: You have to see both sides. Well, no... I can´t. There´s just one side: the one which says "Have fun". Community shouldn´t mean prison and pressure for things that might never come because they were never there. Too high expectations and frustrated artists: now that´s what I call a mess.

Is it just Germany or is it everywhere like that?